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02-Jan-2018 18:05

I realize that you are just following the latest trends because you aren’t original in your choices so let’s come to a negotiation: You may come to the door with your under clothes showing and your pants too big or too small, and I will not comment.

However, to make certain that your clothes do not accidentally slide off or spontaneously explode off your body due to being too tight, I will take my staple gun and fasten your jeans snugly in place to your waist.

Any type of romantic movie theme is strictly prohibited. Rule #9 If you lie to me about anything I will find out.

Even though I may seem like an out of touch, “old geezer” I will find out the truth and trust me, I do know how to Google someone.

A free spirited yoga instructor finds true love in a conservative lawyer and they got married on the first date.

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The Safeway Brands are only available in Safeway Company Stores in the Western US and Canada, in and around the Chicagoland area and at some select convenience stores in the Eastern US. No Safeway Company Stores exist in or around Detroit.

Rule #6 If you plan on dating other girls besides my daughter make sure that you have told her and that she is okay with this.

If she is not okay with this and you make her upset, I will have to find several new methods to make you upset as well.

If you think that you will have opportunities to explore your sexual activity with my daughter you will find out that I will be the only type of birth control that you will need.

There will be no text messaging, video chatting; late night cell phone calls either because I will be watching…everything.

Rule #1 If you plan on taking my daughter on a date and come to my house and honk your horn or call her cell phone you'd better be the UPS man, because you are not picking anything up.



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